Convicted-
I don’t want to greet you for coming back to my raps
I just don’t feel like myself and I can’t even ask for help
Cause happy was a dream I wanted to achieve everyday
But having this regret and guilt makes it heavier so I yell
That I feel convicted in this game of life
and I don’t have a far long sight
to look at the world and try to find a better height
to achieve because reaching on the top would leave me alone All night
I try to act it out and make it look like I am okay but it’s not
Because my life is filled with many relations that have knots
And even Though I try to fill the pain of those
All the people around me always want me to stop
Is there a way for me to get out of this mess
I guess the only think I can do is to squeeze hard my neck
But I can’t because I really hate me for who I am
And If I squeeze my neck that I the thoughts of others will increase The hate I have
Hook(*2)-
I’M CONVICTED,
Cause I am depressed deep inside I’m cut and I can’t even Hide it
IT’S ADDICTING,
My actions are so fake that I might have lost my identity not given.
EVERYTHING’S SO WICKED,
No one understood my heart and when I gave them entry they tore it apart. I’m scared to fail again Cause I can’t handle this fight and I’m drowning in so much pain
I’M CONVICTED.
I can’t feel my soul.
I try help motivate myself to get up but I can’t I’m lost
I hate myself so much that I laugh when I’m depressed
And I even cry it out because I am depressed you know!
And even though I pick myself up some days, In my heart I know that it hurts alot
I can try to counter the pain again But I don’t want to cause I know I won’t win alone
Bridge-
Who am I
Just a lost lover with nothing to do but wait to die
Just a hopeless worker Who can’t fix his heart No I can’t stay alive
Who am I
The negativity in my life arises faster than anything I’ve ever faced
and you can see that in my songs I sing as the use of “No” has raised
Everyone keeps saying me that “It seems so bad that I use such words” But even you know the truth that Is these are the buildings blocks of my verse.
I know that I need to face the main source of this pain
And that source is myself cause I hate me for the gain
But I can’t face it unless it’s only me left in my space
And to find that space I guess I have to die today
But I can’t do it because there are so many fake friends to hate
Me and I’ll allow it cause it is what I deserve
Maybe one day I’ll be set free to go and conserve…. My soul
Higher life 